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Giving your child P.R.I.D.E.

Did you know it only takes 5 minutes of quality time a day with your child to give them a sense of emotional connection with you?  That’s it!  Just 5 minutes of down-on-their-level, one-on-one time per day – you can do that right?  And to make that time even more valuable, mix in the 5 things mentioned above: praise, reflection, imitation, describing behavior, and enjoyment.

 

If you’re wondering where all this is coming from, it’s one of the simplest things I learned in that Love and Logic course my husband and I took last year.  (Remember how I promised I’d be sharing about it?  Turns out it’s actually kind of hard to condense 4 months of classes into a blog post – go figure.  This is my first attempt at breaking down some of what I learned into short, easily digestible bits.)

 

 

 

Each of these things will do wonders not only in building your bond with your child, but also in building their self-confidence and sense of self.  They’re already arranged in an easy to use acronym (PRIDE) but in case you’d like a more permanent reminder, I’ve also made a stick-it-on-the-fridge printable for you here.

 

Before you get to printing, click through for a short summary of each element…


 

Praise
I could (and probably will) write an entire post on how I do and don’t praise my kids.  Basically it comes down to this: be specific and genuine (i.e. avoid lots of generic “good job!”s) and praise effort /avoid labels (i.e. “I like how you kept trying” not “you’re so smart”).

 

Reflection
Repeat back what they’re telling you.  It sounds simple (it is) but it shows that you’re listening and involved in what they’re saying.

 

Imitation
Copying their play and actions has the same benefits as reflection.

 

Describing Behavior
Again, this is about noticing what they’re doing.  So if they say, “Look mommy!” and push a truck over to you, then you respond with, “You’ve got your new fire truck”.

 

Enjoyment
This one’s a no-brainer.  If you’re truly present in the moment and having fun, then you’re kids will notice.

 

One last thing. If you have more than one child, they will benefit from group playtime with you but individual time (even a few minutes) is important too!

 

Do you have any tricks to squeezing in quality time with the kids?  I’d love it if you’d share with us in the comments.

 
Similar Stuff: 
 
“Things I Want to Teach My Children Every Day” Free Printable
“You Are Beautiful Because…” Free Printable
Attention: What Kind (and How Much) Do Kids Really Need?

 

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P.S. Looking for more ways to simplify and connect with your family?


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MPMK's Famous Toy Gift Guides

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Andrea de Oliveira January 30, 2012 at 9:15 am

this is great, thank you for sharing, looking forward for more! :)

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cecilia January 30, 2012 at 2:09 pm

I’m looking forward to your post on praise too (no pressure!)

This is a great reminder.

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2flowerslearn.com January 30, 2012 at 8:02 pm

Love the acronym use. Makes it easier to remember.

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Jordon&Andrea February 1, 2012 at 4:32 am

Thanks for the printable! I try to stagger their naps. My oldest usually wakes up 20-30 minutes before my second son. I can get a lot done with just one child awake and able to play pretty independently on his own- but I do shoot for 5 minutes of actually engaging and playing with him (so this post was validating!). Then my oldest goes down first for naps (especially since he tends to sleep longer) and then I try to give 5 minutes to my younger son. I am excited for the printable and insights in your post. I’ve been a follower for awhile- but am a first time commenter :) Love your site!

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Emily February 2, 2012 at 8:50 pm

I love the acronym – it’s an easy thing to remember.

My favorite moments are waking up, going to bed and making dinner. I’ve recently vowed to slow our mornings down and so far it’s been going well (now that I’m working out of the house it’s a LOT easier!). This means I can take 5-10 minutes (or as long as she’ll give me at 4.5 y/o) to snuggle in bed and talk about whatever – this is the same for bedtime. Our routine is that my husband reads a book and I do singing/snuggling. Often it’s just a snooze fest, but sometimes I really get insight into what’s important to her or about what she’s struggling with b/c it’s a quiet, safe place for her to talk with me.

As for dinner, I just put on music and she dances around the kitchen and when I’m not stirring, I join in. Being silly with her restores me – and she thinks it’s hilarious.

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Mini Piccolini February 3, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Teacher Flavia February 22, 2012 at 1:51 am

Lovely post! It’s been a great pleasure to browse your blog. Soo many useful resources!
If you don’t mind, I’d like to reblog this one @ flaviateaches.blogspot.com
Please, get in touch if you’re not comfortable with it!
xoxo

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